Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Is there Joy is this day???

Christmas in Heaven

I see the countless Christmas trees
Around the world below,
With tiny lights like heaven's stars
Reflecting in the snow.

...The sight is so spectacular
Please wipe away that tear
For I'm spending Christmas
With Jesus Christ this year.

I hear the many Christmas songs
That people hold so dear
But earthly music can't compare
With the Christmas choir up here.

I have no words to tell you
The joy their voices bring
For it's beyond description
To hear the angels sing.

I know how much you miss me,
Trust God and have no fear
For I'm spending Christmas
With Jesus Christ this year.

I can't tell you of the splendor
Or the peace here in this place.
Can you imagine Christmas
With our Savior, face to face?

May God uplift your spirit
As I tell Him of your love
Then pray for one another
As you lift your eyes above.

Please let your hearts be joyful
And let your spirits sing
For I'm spending Christmas in Heaven
And I'm walking with the King!"

By Wanda Bencke

I used this entry last year to wish my dear sweet baby boy a Merry Christmas last year. I picture him, looking at us like these pictures show, watching us with joy in his eyes as he witnesses all the amazing things heaven has in store for us. I just finished reading "Heaven is For Real" and I am so....amazed.... about the things that this little boy, Colton, tells of heaven. But more that that, I am so at peace with the knowledge that my son is there and he will know us when we get there and we will know him..instantly. It brings me Joy on this day, this third anniversary of the day we learned that Cole would not be coming home with us that he, instead, lives in a home so filled with beauty, joy, love, peace and hope. It is hard, it is sad and it isn't what I ever wanted. But it is what it is, it is my life and I am making it all that it can be with the help of the Lord. I can feel joy today because I know that my son is there with Jesus, sitting on his knee and enjoying the most amazing things. It brings me Joy to know that because I have accepted Jesus and am building a relationship with Him, that I will (well this is how I perceive it and I'm sure some will argue this with me) go to Heaven one day and I will see my son again. My heart, today on this sad day, is still filled with joy.

Incidentally I do need to add that I do not believe that Cole left us this day three years ago and went to be Jesus. I truly believe that his spirit remained with us for the rest of the pregnancy and that he kept his mommy and his twin brother safe for the 10.5 weeks that I remained pregnant after his heart stopped beating. So this isn't really the third anniversary of the day Cole left us for Heaven, just the third anniversary of the day that changed our lives forever, the third anniversary of the day we knew that our twins would be born together to grow apart.

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