Ok, I am back. A wonderful break that apparently involved no blogging LOL! The break was wonderful but so very busy. For those who don’t know, the area I live in holds ‘Canada’s Largest Irish Festival’ for St. Patrick’s day and I am involved in the service club that puts it on. Needless to say I am exhausted. Cameron was sick on Thursday night…so sick that we thought he stopped breathing… but maybe I was just so exhausted that I dreamed it. He has pneumonia and a bacterial infection but doesn’t seem to have been slowed by this…I wish I could have a bit of that child’s energy!!!
So anyway, back to my blog posts on the movie Courageous. As I wrote about last time, these men drew up a contract of sorts with the promises they made regarding their role in their family. I would love to see every parent see this movie and every father take on this resolution. And as I said last time, I think it applies so much to women too…there is so much that all parents can take from this resolution.
In my research into this movie I came across a resolution for women too. It was written in response to the movie, as a way to bring women to the table so to speak…to have a way for women to be accountable for their role in a family. Today I want to take a look at it and comment on it.
The Resolution for Women
I do solemnly resolve to embrace my current season of life and will maximize my time in it. I will resist the urge to hurry through or circumvent any portion of my journey but will love with a spirit of contentment.
I will champion God’s model for womanhood in the face of a post feminist culture. I will teach it to my daughters and encourage its support by my sons.
I will accept and celebrate my uniqueness, and will esteem and encourage the distinctions I admire in others.
I will live as a woman answerable to God and faithfully committed to His Word.
I will seek to devote the best of myself, my time, and my talents to the primary roles the Lord has entrusted to me in this phase of my life.
I will be a woman who is quick to listen and slow to speak. I will care about the concerns of others and esteem them more highly than myself.
I will forgive those who have wronged me and reconcile with those I have wronged.
I will not tolerate evil influences even in the most justifiable form, in myself or my home, but will embrace and encourage a life of purity.
I will be faithful to my husband and honor him in my conduct and conversation in order to bring glory to the name of the Lord. I will aspire to be a suitable partner for him to help him reach his God-given potential.
I will demonstrate to my children how to love God with all their hearts, minds, and strength, and will train them to respect authority and live responsibly.
I will cultivate a peaceful home where everyone can sense God’s presence not only through acts of love and service but also through the pleasant and grateful attitude with which I perform them.
I fully resolve to make today’s decisions with tomorrow’s impact in mind. I will consider my current choices in light of those who will come after me.
Wow…that is a lot to take on. So much of that does not come easily or naturally to me, to most women. We have become a culture of independent women, women who lead the household, who make the decisions, who control the day to day life, do most to all the parenting/discipline, control the finances, speak their mind and not tolerate anyone who disrespects us and maybe I’d go as bold as to say, who questions us.
It is so very hard to realize that this is NOT what God wanted. More than realizing, it is so hard to break the habits that the feminism era has brought to us. Now I am not saying that all the changes that were made were negative. By no means. Nowhere in the bible does it say that husbands can disrespect their wives, control with an iron fist and make each and every decision. What it does say is this….
Ephesians 5:22-33 (NIV)
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing[a] her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”[b] 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Pretty heavy stuff in a way…surely something that would get the feminist more than a bit hot under the collar. But that is because they don’t understand what Paul was really saying. They take it literally, that women are to be submissive. But that isn’t really what Paul’s intent was. Instead he was giving a directive for a voluntary yielding in love on the part of the wife. Nowhere does it say that the husbands are to control their wives. Instead it instructs the wives to take submission into their own hands. This does not deny the husband and wife's essential equality before God, which Paul mentions in Galatians 3:28, where he declares, "There is neither ... male nor female, for all are one in Christ."
Since both men and women share equality before God then why do women need to submit to their husbands? Paul tells us that wives submit to husbands as the head of the household just as Christ is the head of the church. We don’t question that we need to submit to the head of the church and thus by following this teaching, wives are doing this as an act of obedience to the Lord… by submitting to our husbands we are showing reverence for the one they submit to…the Lord.
And this submission doesn’t mean we don’t’ stand up for what we believe in, it doesn’t mean that men are always right, that we have to believe all they say to be true. What it does mean is that ultimately it needs to be the husband who leads the family. "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church" (verse 25) does not mean husbands, "Be the head over your wife." Rather Paul tells them to love their wives. Paul says three simple things about this love. The husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the church (verses 25-27), as his own body (28-30), and with a passion transcending all other commitments (31-33).
The author of one site I read put Paul’s direction…his urging to the husband to set the tone of spiritual leadership in the home in a way that made it so much clearer...
At the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to lead, provide for, and protect women in ways appropriate to a man's differing relationships."4 A husband needs to assume a certain responsibility for the spiritual growth of his wife. In order to do that, though, husbands must "give themselves" for their wives (verse 25) by laying aside many of their own personal desires and conveniences in order to fulfill a higher and prior call.
Now back to the resolution. There is a lot of pretty ‘big’ stuff in there. I know there are a great many things that I fall short on but then again, all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. Romans 3:23(NIV). I know that my views on what is ‘an evil influence’ has greatly changed in the last few months. It’s hard to break old habits, hard not to read and watch things that captivated me before but were an influence that was not one that I need or want in my life. I know that I do not always use my time wisely and in a way that is honoring to the roles that God has for me. I chose my own needs over others at times, I put myself ahead of my husband often and sometimes I put myself ahead of my kids or others in my life…others who God is trying to get me to use my talents to help and to serve. That isn’t to say that God wants us to never have time for ourselves because that is not his attention. The time we have for ourselves can, and should be, used wisely and in a way that further serves the Lord. Taking time for yourself to walk, to meditate, to pray, to think and to find a sense of peace are all ways that we can bring ourselves to a better place where we can be in the role of the woman God calls us to be. Being slow to speak, honouring my husband in my conduct and conversation (especially those about or with him around others…when I am angry or annoyed) and bringing a sense of peace to my home are areas that need an intense amount of focus. I am falling short here and I need to gather myself together and find a way to right my ways.
But all in all I think I am working hard to ‘resolve’ areas in my life so that I am the woman God wants me to be. It’s a resolution that will be an on going project but a project that moves forward.
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Friday, March 9, 2012
Courageous 2
I have just found so many things that have inspired in me in this movie (click here to see a trailer).
It’s like watching parts of my life and wondering how I’ll do, how I will make out the journey of parenthood. As I said yesterday, I’ve made so many mistakes and I can’t take them back. Some days I wonder if the changes I want to make will ever actually happen , ever actually take effect. I know that I, no we, have improved…greatly. But it seems like such a long journey. And the fact is, it is a long journey, a long, hard journey. No one said life would be easy, the bible tells us...
1 Peter 4:12-13
Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.
Acts 14:22
"We must go through many hardships to enter the kingdom of God."
The book of Job is filled with an account of how life is not easy for a Christian. Through it all we can learn that we must keep going, keep trying, be persistent an d persevere and ours will be the Kingdom of Heaven. And so I won’t give up and I promise I will get better!
Courageous has inspired me to do this… to take parenting seriously and to take it on courageously. Adam Mitchell, the main character , knew this and he sat down his group of male friends and told them…
“I don't feel like I've started well, but I want to finish well. What I want for you is that you seek the Lord. That you trust Him, even if it means you’re standing alone."
And with that (and a few other things…I mean it is a movie, it’s gotta have a plot!!!) Adam presented them with a piece of paper simply titled
The Resolution
I do solemnly resolve before God to take full responsibility for myself, my wife, and my children.
I WILL love them, protect them, serve them, and teach them the Word of God as the spiritual leader of my home.
I WILL be faithful to my wife, to love and honor her, and be willing to lay down my life for her as Jesus Christ did for me.
I WILL bless my children and teach them to love God with all of their hearts, all of their minds, and all of their strength.
I WILL train them to honor authority and live responsibly.
I WILL confront evil, pursue justice, and love mercy.
I WILL pray for others and treat them with kindness, respect, and compassion.
I WILL work diligently to provide for the needs of my family.
WILL forgive those who have wronged me and reconcile with those I have wronged.
I WILL learn from my mistakes, repent of my sins, and walk with integrity as a man answerable to God. I WILL seek to honor God, be faithful to His church, obey His Word, and do His will. I WILL courageously work with the strength God provides to fulfill this resolution for the rest of my life and for His glory.
As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. —Joshua 24:15
I think this is just the most amazing code to live by and watching these men discuss it, prepare to take this oath together, dress in their finest, bring their families to witness it and read this resolution out loud to a preacher, to their families, to each other and most importantly, to God was so very moving. But more than that, it was so very inspiring. The most inspiring thing is that it is totally biblically based…God really told men to live this way. The men in Courageous printed this up and put it in a frame and placed it on the wall of their homes as a reminder of the code they needed to live by, of the promise they made to live by that code.
It’s a lot to live up I think. And from what I’ve learned, once you commit to something like this, once you make a commitment to Christ, life doesn’t necessarily get easier. Often it gets harder. Because if God wants you to be a part of His family, to walk the path He intended for you, you can well imagine that another powerful force will want to undo that, will want you to follow the ways of the world, the ways that aren’t of Christ. The devil wants us just as much as God does….he just has manipulative ways of trying to get us there.
But I am committed, I am trying, I am dedicated and I know it won’t be easy. But I will do this and I won’t be easily swayed….
Because...
As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. —Joshua 24:15
Stay tuned for the The Resolution for women.... hopefully March Break doesn't interupt my posting schedule too much!!!
It’s like watching parts of my life and wondering how I’ll do, how I will make out the journey of parenthood. As I said yesterday, I’ve made so many mistakes and I can’t take them back. Some days I wonder if the changes I want to make will ever actually happen , ever actually take effect. I know that I, no we, have improved…greatly. But it seems like such a long journey. And the fact is, it is a long journey, a long, hard journey. No one said life would be easy, the bible tells us...
1 Peter 4:12-13
Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.
Acts 14:22
"We must go through many hardships to enter the kingdom of God."
The book of Job is filled with an account of how life is not easy for a Christian. Through it all we can learn that we must keep going, keep trying, be persistent an d persevere and ours will be the Kingdom of Heaven. And so I won’t give up and I promise I will get better!
Courageous has inspired me to do this… to take parenting seriously and to take it on courageously. Adam Mitchell, the main character , knew this and he sat down his group of male friends and told them…
“I don't feel like I've started well, but I want to finish well. What I want for you is that you seek the Lord. That you trust Him, even if it means you’re standing alone."
And with that (and a few other things…I mean it is a movie, it’s gotta have a plot!!!) Adam presented them with a piece of paper simply titled
The Resolution
I do solemnly resolve before God to take full responsibility for myself, my wife, and my children.
I WILL love them, protect them, serve them, and teach them the Word of God as the spiritual leader of my home.
I WILL be faithful to my wife, to love and honor her, and be willing to lay down my life for her as Jesus Christ did for me.
I WILL bless my children and teach them to love God with all of their hearts, all of their minds, and all of their strength.
I WILL train them to honor authority and live responsibly.
I WILL confront evil, pursue justice, and love mercy.
I WILL pray for others and treat them with kindness, respect, and compassion.
I WILL work diligently to provide for the needs of my family.
WILL forgive those who have wronged me and reconcile with those I have wronged.
I WILL learn from my mistakes, repent of my sins, and walk with integrity as a man answerable to God. I WILL seek to honor God, be faithful to His church, obey His Word, and do His will. I WILL courageously work with the strength God provides to fulfill this resolution for the rest of my life and for His glory.
As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. —Joshua 24:15
I think this is just the most amazing code to live by and watching these men discuss it, prepare to take this oath together, dress in their finest, bring their families to witness it and read this resolution out loud to a preacher, to their families, to each other and most importantly, to God was so very moving. But more than that, it was so very inspiring. The most inspiring thing is that it is totally biblically based…God really told men to live this way. The men in Courageous printed this up and put it in a frame and placed it on the wall of their homes as a reminder of the code they needed to live by, of the promise they made to live by that code.
It’s a lot to live up I think. And from what I’ve learned, once you commit to something like this, once you make a commitment to Christ, life doesn’t necessarily get easier. Often it gets harder. Because if God wants you to be a part of His family, to walk the path He intended for you, you can well imagine that another powerful force will want to undo that, will want you to follow the ways of the world, the ways that aren’t of Christ. The devil wants us just as much as God does….he just has manipulative ways of trying to get us there.
But I am committed, I am trying, I am dedicated and I know it won’t be easy. But I will do this and I won’t be easily swayed….
Because...
As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. —Joshua 24:15
Stay tuned for the The Resolution for women.... hopefully March Break doesn't interupt my posting schedule too much!!!
Monday, March 5, 2012
Courageous - Post 1
I recently took my two older sons to see the movie Courageous. I’ve seen it before and I think I cried more this time, was affected much more deeply this time, then when I saw it in October. I also know, for a fact, that I have changed the way I look at my family and at my husband since then, I know for a fact that I am a different person, a person much further in their journey with Christ since I first saw this movie.
I’ve decided that I want to write a series of blog posts on this movie and the way that it has impacted me as a mom, as a wife and as a Christian. First of all though, a brief overview of the movie….
Honor Begins at Home
Four men, one calling: To serve and protect. As law enforcement officers, Adam Mitchell, Nathan Hayes, David Thomson, and Shane Fuller are confident and focused. Yet at the end of the day, they face a challenge that none of them are truly prepared to tackle: fatherhood.
While they consistently give their best on the job, good enough seems to be all they can muster as dads. But they're quickly discovering that their standard is missing the mark.
When tragedy hits home, these men are left wrestling with their hopes, their fears, their faith, and their fathering. Can a newfound urgency help these dads draw closer to God ... and to their children?
Filled with action-packed police drama, COURAGEOUS is the fourth film from Sherwood Pictures, the moviemaking ministry of Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, Georgia. Viewers will once again find themselves laughing, crying, and cheering as they are challenged and inspired by everyday heroes who long to be the kinds of dads that make a lifelong impact on their children.
Protecting the streets is second nature to these men. Raising their children in a God-honoring way? That will take courage. Courageous ... honor begins at home
The tragedy they mention above is that Adam Mitchell’s daughter, Emily, is killed by a drunk driver. It has, understandably, a huge impact on his family, his view of the world, his journey with Christ. I have much to say about this part of the movie but that will come at another time.
After Adam losses his daughter he begins to realize that he is not who he wants to be, that he falls short of the glory of God (as we all do) most noticeably in the area of fatherhood. And so begins his quest to change, to better himself, to be the father that the Lord wants him to be because…
Adam Mitchell: "I don't want to be a good enough father. We have a few short years to influence our kids. Whatever patterns we set for them in life will be used for their kids, and the generation after that. We have the responsibility to mold a life. And I don't think that should be done casually. Half the fathers in this country are already failing, and I don't want to be one of them. I'm talking about setting the standards that they need to aim for in life"
I think we, those who have kids, especially young kids, need to think hard about this. Are we setting patterns that we don’t want to see repeated. I know I am, I know I hate the things that come out of my mouth at times, hate the lack of patience I have at times. I have been trying to change this for so long but it is so hard to break habits and that is just the lamest excuse EVER!!! I am not using it as an excuse though, I am saying it as it is. I have wanted to change and I have been determined to change. So what went wrong??? Well I didn’t turn to God to help. I didn’t really know I should earlier and then once I did know I just, well, I just didn’t know how.
The first place I looked was the instructional manual for life and I found this…
Proverbs 19:18 Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death.
Proverbs 22:6 Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.
Proverbs 29:17 Discipline your son, and he will give you peace; he will bring delight to your soul.
Ephesians 6:4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.
So much to learn on discipline … but how to apply it… how to bring that in to effect is what I am unclear about. I know the reasons for discipline, I see those reasons every day at work with kids who so obviously run the show at home. And when I think about how to teach them, how to instill the skills they need and the characteristics that I want them to have, I realize that the bible is the best teacher. Just reading to them the stories of so many in the bible who didn’t follow the ways of the Lord and what happened to them. Reading them the parables that Jesus used to teach so many amazing lessons on human character. But more than just reading it, I need to live it. I need to set the example and be the role model. And I need to be a positive influence, not nag them to death, not drive them away by controlling their every move, by not giving them any choices but by allowing them to grow in a loving, nurturing, supportive environment.
Deuteronomy 4:9-10 Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. Remember the day you stood before the Lord your God at Horeb, when he said to me, “Assemble the people before me to hear my words so that they may learn to revere me as long as they live in the land and may teach them to their children.”
Deuteronomy 6:6-9 These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
Proverbs 12:1 Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates correction is stupid.
Proverbs 15:10 Stern discipline awaits him who leaves the path; he who hates correction will die.
Something I find in my house that we do too often is to either wait too long to follow through with discipline…therefore causing confusion and misunderstanding…
Ecclesiastes 8:11 When the sentence for a crime is not quickly carried out, the hearts of the people are filled with schemes to do wrong.
Or we over react…therefore again causing confusion and misunderstanding….
2 Corinthians 2:6-8 The punishment inflicted on him by the majority is sufficient for him. Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him.
I know that often it would be so much more affective to not say much at all to my kids when they are acting out but rather to express my disappointment in them…KISS…keep it simple stupid. Unfortunately I think stupid , or atleast stupid mouth, could be my middle name. Learning to stop talking, to say as little as possible, is very hard for me. Learning to be patient and calm…also hard. I think I am repeating what I’ve witnessed so much over the years and breaking that cycle is hard. Learning as an adult seems to be one of the greatest challenges we can give ourselves. And I know that in my weak moments, in my frustrating moments, in my dark moments of parenting I think that it’s just too late, that I am too far gone and that my kids are too far gone. But they aren’t! I am not…I just need to slow down, breath, think and most of all PRAY!
Adam Mitchell said it best… : "I don't feel like I've started well, but I want to finish well. What I want for you is that you seek the Lord. That you trust Him, even if it means your standing alone."
And thankfully I am not standing alone…I have a wonderful husband who wishes the same thing and an amazing community of friends, especially those from church, who are willing to stand beside me and help me along the way.
Changing takes courage..it is always easier to take the easy way out and keep things as status quo but I know that God will walk beside me and I him…it’s not too late. I may not have started well, but it’s not too late.
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
Joshua 1:9
I’ve decided that I want to write a series of blog posts on this movie and the way that it has impacted me as a mom, as a wife and as a Christian. First of all though, a brief overview of the movie….
Honor Begins at Home
Four men, one calling: To serve and protect. As law enforcement officers, Adam Mitchell, Nathan Hayes, David Thomson, and Shane Fuller are confident and focused. Yet at the end of the day, they face a challenge that none of them are truly prepared to tackle: fatherhood.
While they consistently give their best on the job, good enough seems to be all they can muster as dads. But they're quickly discovering that their standard is missing the mark.
When tragedy hits home, these men are left wrestling with their hopes, their fears, their faith, and their fathering. Can a newfound urgency help these dads draw closer to God ... and to their children?
Filled with action-packed police drama, COURAGEOUS is the fourth film from Sherwood Pictures, the moviemaking ministry of Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, Georgia. Viewers will once again find themselves laughing, crying, and cheering as they are challenged and inspired by everyday heroes who long to be the kinds of dads that make a lifelong impact on their children.
Protecting the streets is second nature to these men. Raising their children in a God-honoring way? That will take courage. Courageous ... honor begins at home
The tragedy they mention above is that Adam Mitchell’s daughter, Emily, is killed by a drunk driver. It has, understandably, a huge impact on his family, his view of the world, his journey with Christ. I have much to say about this part of the movie but that will come at another time.
After Adam losses his daughter he begins to realize that he is not who he wants to be, that he falls short of the glory of God (as we all do) most noticeably in the area of fatherhood. And so begins his quest to change, to better himself, to be the father that the Lord wants him to be because…
Adam Mitchell: "I don't want to be a good enough father. We have a few short years to influence our kids. Whatever patterns we set for them in life will be used for their kids, and the generation after that. We have the responsibility to mold a life. And I don't think that should be done casually. Half the fathers in this country are already failing, and I don't want to be one of them. I'm talking about setting the standards that they need to aim for in life"
I think we, those who have kids, especially young kids, need to think hard about this. Are we setting patterns that we don’t want to see repeated. I know I am, I know I hate the things that come out of my mouth at times, hate the lack of patience I have at times. I have been trying to change this for so long but it is so hard to break habits and that is just the lamest excuse EVER!!! I am not using it as an excuse though, I am saying it as it is. I have wanted to change and I have been determined to change. So what went wrong??? Well I didn’t turn to God to help. I didn’t really know I should earlier and then once I did know I just, well, I just didn’t know how.
The first place I looked was the instructional manual for life and I found this…
Proverbs 19:18 Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death.
Proverbs 22:6 Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.
Proverbs 29:17 Discipline your son, and he will give you peace; he will bring delight to your soul.
Ephesians 6:4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.
So much to learn on discipline … but how to apply it… how to bring that in to effect is what I am unclear about. I know the reasons for discipline, I see those reasons every day at work with kids who so obviously run the show at home. And when I think about how to teach them, how to instill the skills they need and the characteristics that I want them to have, I realize that the bible is the best teacher. Just reading to them the stories of so many in the bible who didn’t follow the ways of the Lord and what happened to them. Reading them the parables that Jesus used to teach so many amazing lessons on human character. But more than just reading it, I need to live it. I need to set the example and be the role model. And I need to be a positive influence, not nag them to death, not drive them away by controlling their every move, by not giving them any choices but by allowing them to grow in a loving, nurturing, supportive environment.
Deuteronomy 4:9-10 Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. Remember the day you stood before the Lord your God at Horeb, when he said to me, “Assemble the people before me to hear my words so that they may learn to revere me as long as they live in the land and may teach them to their children.”
Deuteronomy 6:6-9 These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
Proverbs 12:1 Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates correction is stupid.
Proverbs 15:10 Stern discipline awaits him who leaves the path; he who hates correction will die.
Something I find in my house that we do too often is to either wait too long to follow through with discipline…therefore causing confusion and misunderstanding…
Ecclesiastes 8:11 When the sentence for a crime is not quickly carried out, the hearts of the people are filled with schemes to do wrong.
Or we over react…therefore again causing confusion and misunderstanding….
2 Corinthians 2:6-8 The punishment inflicted on him by the majority is sufficient for him. Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him.
I know that often it would be so much more affective to not say much at all to my kids when they are acting out but rather to express my disappointment in them…KISS…keep it simple stupid. Unfortunately I think stupid , or atleast stupid mouth, could be my middle name. Learning to stop talking, to say as little as possible, is very hard for me. Learning to be patient and calm…also hard. I think I am repeating what I’ve witnessed so much over the years and breaking that cycle is hard. Learning as an adult seems to be one of the greatest challenges we can give ourselves. And I know that in my weak moments, in my frustrating moments, in my dark moments of parenting I think that it’s just too late, that I am too far gone and that my kids are too far gone. But they aren’t! I am not…I just need to slow down, breath, think and most of all PRAY!
Adam Mitchell said it best… : "I don't feel like I've started well, but I want to finish well. What I want for you is that you seek the Lord. That you trust Him, even if it means your standing alone."
And thankfully I am not standing alone…I have a wonderful husband who wishes the same thing and an amazing community of friends, especially those from church, who are willing to stand beside me and help me along the way.
Changing takes courage..it is always easier to take the easy way out and keep things as status quo but I know that God will walk beside me and I him…it’s not too late. I may not have started well, but it’s not too late.
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
Joshua 1:9
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Getting my head in the right place...how to put responsiblity and service into perspective????
We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. If a man's gift is prophesying, let him use it in proportion to his faith. If it is serving, let him serve; if it is teaching, let him teach; if it is encouraging, let him encourage... (Romans 12:6-8 NIV)
So for the past few weeks I've been dreaming about how I'll write some amazing blogs about Spiritual Gifts...expand on them, talk about my own, make plans for it and instead my head and life has been filled with so many mixed up feelings, actions and obsessions. I do believe that much of it does relate to my spiritual gift of 'encouragement/exhortion/mercy'...haven't set on one for sure yet but ironically (okay not so at all) the top practical gift that comes under these is writing.
Anyway, I truly believe that God has given me the gift of encouragement
The gift of encouragement (also called the gift of exhortation) involves motivating, encouraging, and consoling others so they mature in their walk with Jesus.
People with the Gift of Encouragement
Christians with this gift have an unusual sensitivity for and are attracted to those who are discouraged or struggling. As a result, people tend to pursue them for healing words, gracious truth, and compassionate counsel. These people also tend to have a high degree of patience and optimism. They may have a knack for one-on-one relationships and prefer working with an individual or small group.
I believe this is what I do well, especially in my TTTS world...maybe best in my TTTS world...maybe only in my TTTS world. It really is irrelevant...if God is guiding me to do it then it'll happen wherever it happens. But as I say this I realize that it is in other places too and, hopefully, occurs best with the keyboard under these fingers of mine and on the is very blog you are reading.
So anyway...I have been really working at discovering this gift God has bestowed on me... working on and exploring. And in the midst of that the same tough struggles with the stuff I wrote about a bit ago about spiritual gifts and my support of TTTS families has come back...three fold. And now the tension in that area of my life has caused me to do things I am not proud of, has made me think and rethink my decisions and question so much of what is right and wrong in a not for profit world. And it has made me wonder what my responsibility is at times, what does Jesus want from me when I am faced with something I feel is wrong, unethical etc. And I am not sure I have an answer.
When I researched it I found this...
1 Corinthians 8:7-13
New American Standard Bible (NASB)
7 However not all men have this knowledge; but some, being accustomed to the idol until now, eat food as if it were sacrificed to an idol; and their conscience being weak is defiled. 8 But food will not [a]commend us to God; we are neither [b]the worse if we do not eat, nor [c]the better if we do eat. 9 But take care that this [d]liberty of yours does not somehow become a stumbling block to the weak. 10 For if someone sees you, who have knowledge, dining in an idol’s temple, will not his conscience, if he is weak, be strengthened to eat things sacrificed to idols? 11 For through your knowledge he who is weak is ruined, the brother for whose sake Christ died. 12 And so, by sinning against the brethren and wounding their conscience when it is weak, you sin against Christ. 13 Therefore, if food causes my brother to stumble, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause my brother to stumble.
Does this activity defile my conscience? Could this activity hinder the growth of a fellow believer? Could I cause another brother to stumble, if so I would be better not to be involved in something that could affect a brother. They may have a weaker conscience. It could cause them to believe this is OK and even get themselves involved in something much more worse. For another it could divisions and disunity between brothers that could affect the whole body of Christ.
Does the activity of this person or group 'defile' my conscience? Definitely. It has been driving me crazy because I really feel what is happening is wrong. Could it, the actions, cause another Christian to stumble??? Not sure... I think that the actions of the person are an act of stumbling but I am not sure if it would cause another person to stumble in their walk with the Lord...only if they knew what was happening and suppported it I think. It is defintely something I no longer want anything to do with... that much I know.(not that it matters since I've been banned!!!) And all that has happened with it lately has not been good for me at all.
1 Corinthians 10:23-31
New International Version (NIV)
23 “I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but not everything is constructive. 24 No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.
Does this activity edify myself or another believer? Does this activity bring glory to God? Could this cause give Christ a bad name, since we are ambassadors and representatives of Christ, everything we do is often seen by others as a reflection of Christ, bringing reproach on Him, the Church and body of Christ.
Hmmmm...this is a tough one. This person told me just a few weeks ago that that 'she too is a Christian'. If this is how a Christian conducts themselves on behalf of many family's memorials or tributes to TTTS babies then I am not sure...just so not sure.
And so I continue to struggle because what I have learned about some of the places that support can be found in within the TTTS world don't always operate on the same principals that I think is right. It has really torn me up inside and I really don't know what I should do or say. By speaking my thoughts, not in any rude way or even accusing way...simply questioning expenses and even giving the benefit of the doubt...I was banned from a group where I have enjoyed giving support. And this came within days of me apologizing to someone in this group for any preveious ill will between us...and my apology being accepted.
And the more I thought about what to do, the more I fixated I became. I even created a different persona in attempts to get back into that group. But that just felt horrible...I mean to impersonate anyone who has gone through this dreadful diagnosis but not be honest about it...that is horrible!
But what to do, what do do became my mantra and something I just couldn't let go of. I prayed on it for days and still no answers. And then last weekend Geoff and I attended a marriage conference called Love and Respect. As an aside, I highly recommend the conference, the program and the books to anyone. You can find information about it here.
During this conference we were reminded that all of our actions on earth have consequences. When we reach the day of judgement, when we stand before the Lord, He will look at our lives and tell us how he feels about it. Not everything is going to be perfect, not everything will go as planned. And just because someone doesn't respond the way that makes it easier for you (in marriage that is your spouse...who might not respond favourably to your attempts to be respectful or loving OR in a family that could be your kids and no matter how hard you try you just can't 'get them to listen' or give you respect), you still must follow the teachings of Christ, you must work hard to be what He wants you to be, to follow what He has instructed you to be no matter how hard that is and no matter whether it is received or not. And when you do, when your life is over and as a Christian who believes Christ has died for their sins, who has asked that Christ forgive them for their sins and help them to live a life according to his teachings...when your time of judgement comes you can feel pretty confident that this is what He will say....
Matthew 25:23 NIV
"His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'
And so I guess that it really isn't up to me to decide what is right or wrong, it is not up to me to get involved directly and decide what is right or wrong...God will do that. I do believe I am responsible to ensure that I share some of what I've learned with others so that people can make informed choices, so others do not end up being mislead or misrepresented. And I know that it is also my responsiblity to remove myself from the negativity that this has brought me...because the negativity is bringing me to a place that is not following Christ's teachings and again, it's not up to me to pass judgement or dish out consequences for actions that are quite likely unethical. I am not the one, who those who may be participating, in this need to face.
So I will say this much about this and then it is so very much time to move away from any contact with this particular organization and the person who founded it and runs it...
If you donate your money, anywhere, you need to research the place you donate well before handing that money out. GuideStar is a website that may help you to navigate this... they are US based but it seems that you can get some Canadian information. Here and here are two links to organizations heavily involved with TTTS support, fundraising, etc. I will only say this much more on this subject and then I am dedicating myself to providing support to TTTS families with the support of the Fetal Hope Foundation....
Fetal Hope ROCKS!!! They raised around $90 000 in 2010 and it was split up at over $30 000 each to helping families travel to have surgeries or see doctors and to supporting those doctors through grant programs. They are the group that I have found the most support in and am so grateful for all they did to help us on our journey. They even contacted various doctors on our behalf when we were questioning test results while I was in the hospital. They called me then to see how I was, they emailed, they connected! And afterwards they were there to help me pick up the pieces and to feel that I was not alone. I have spent the last 2 years working at ways to help them and it is beginning to come to fruition...it that is a feeling that warms my heart. And maybe just another part of that spritual gift... thanks God!
So for the past few weeks I've been dreaming about how I'll write some amazing blogs about Spiritual Gifts...expand on them, talk about my own, make plans for it and instead my head and life has been filled with so many mixed up feelings, actions and obsessions. I do believe that much of it does relate to my spiritual gift of 'encouragement/exhortion/mercy'...haven't set on one for sure yet but ironically (okay not so at all) the top practical gift that comes under these is writing.
Anyway, I truly believe that God has given me the gift of encouragement
The gift of encouragement (also called the gift of exhortation) involves motivating, encouraging, and consoling others so they mature in their walk with Jesus.
People with the Gift of Encouragement
Christians with this gift have an unusual sensitivity for and are attracted to those who are discouraged or struggling. As a result, people tend to pursue them for healing words, gracious truth, and compassionate counsel. These people also tend to have a high degree of patience and optimism. They may have a knack for one-on-one relationships and prefer working with an individual or small group.
I believe this is what I do well, especially in my TTTS world...maybe best in my TTTS world...maybe only in my TTTS world. It really is irrelevant...if God is guiding me to do it then it'll happen wherever it happens. But as I say this I realize that it is in other places too and, hopefully, occurs best with the keyboard under these fingers of mine and on the is very blog you are reading.
So anyway...I have been really working at discovering this gift God has bestowed on me... working on and exploring. And in the midst of that the same tough struggles with the stuff I wrote about a bit ago about spiritual gifts and my support of TTTS families has come back...three fold. And now the tension in that area of my life has caused me to do things I am not proud of, has made me think and rethink my decisions and question so much of what is right and wrong in a not for profit world. And it has made me wonder what my responsibility is at times, what does Jesus want from me when I am faced with something I feel is wrong, unethical etc. And I am not sure I have an answer.
When I researched it I found this...
1 Corinthians 8:7-13
New American Standard Bible (NASB)
7 However not all men have this knowledge; but some, being accustomed to the idol until now, eat food as if it were sacrificed to an idol; and their conscience being weak is defiled. 8 But food will not [a]commend us to God; we are neither [b]the worse if we do not eat, nor [c]the better if we do eat. 9 But take care that this [d]liberty of yours does not somehow become a stumbling block to the weak. 10 For if someone sees you, who have knowledge, dining in an idol’s temple, will not his conscience, if he is weak, be strengthened to eat things sacrificed to idols? 11 For through your knowledge he who is weak is ruined, the brother for whose sake Christ died. 12 And so, by sinning against the brethren and wounding their conscience when it is weak, you sin against Christ. 13 Therefore, if food causes my brother to stumble, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause my brother to stumble.
Does this activity defile my conscience? Could this activity hinder the growth of a fellow believer? Could I cause another brother to stumble, if so I would be better not to be involved in something that could affect a brother. They may have a weaker conscience. It could cause them to believe this is OK and even get themselves involved in something much more worse. For another it could divisions and disunity between brothers that could affect the whole body of Christ.
Does the activity of this person or group 'defile' my conscience? Definitely. It has been driving me crazy because I really feel what is happening is wrong. Could it, the actions, cause another Christian to stumble??? Not sure... I think that the actions of the person are an act of stumbling but I am not sure if it would cause another person to stumble in their walk with the Lord...only if they knew what was happening and suppported it I think. It is defintely something I no longer want anything to do with... that much I know.(not that it matters since I've been banned!!!) And all that has happened with it lately has not been good for me at all.
1 Corinthians 10:23-31
New International Version (NIV)
23 “I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but not everything is constructive. 24 No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.
Does this activity edify myself or another believer? Does this activity bring glory to God? Could this cause give Christ a bad name, since we are ambassadors and representatives of Christ, everything we do is often seen by others as a reflection of Christ, bringing reproach on Him, the Church and body of Christ.
Hmmmm...this is a tough one. This person told me just a few weeks ago that that 'she too is a Christian'. If this is how a Christian conducts themselves on behalf of many family's memorials or tributes to TTTS babies then I am not sure...just so not sure.
And so I continue to struggle because what I have learned about some of the places that support can be found in within the TTTS world don't always operate on the same principals that I think is right. It has really torn me up inside and I really don't know what I should do or say. By speaking my thoughts, not in any rude way or even accusing way...simply questioning expenses and even giving the benefit of the doubt...I was banned from a group where I have enjoyed giving support. And this came within days of me apologizing to someone in this group for any preveious ill will between us...and my apology being accepted.
And the more I thought about what to do, the more I fixated I became. I even created a different persona in attempts to get back into that group. But that just felt horrible...I mean to impersonate anyone who has gone through this dreadful diagnosis but not be honest about it...that is horrible!
But what to do, what do do became my mantra and something I just couldn't let go of. I prayed on it for days and still no answers. And then last weekend Geoff and I attended a marriage conference called Love and Respect. As an aside, I highly recommend the conference, the program and the books to anyone. You can find information about it here.
During this conference we were reminded that all of our actions on earth have consequences. When we reach the day of judgement, when we stand before the Lord, He will look at our lives and tell us how he feels about it. Not everything is going to be perfect, not everything will go as planned. And just because someone doesn't respond the way that makes it easier for you (in marriage that is your spouse...who might not respond favourably to your attempts to be respectful or loving OR in a family that could be your kids and no matter how hard you try you just can't 'get them to listen' or give you respect), you still must follow the teachings of Christ, you must work hard to be what He wants you to be, to follow what He has instructed you to be no matter how hard that is and no matter whether it is received or not. And when you do, when your life is over and as a Christian who believes Christ has died for their sins, who has asked that Christ forgive them for their sins and help them to live a life according to his teachings...when your time of judgement comes you can feel pretty confident that this is what He will say....
Matthew 25:23 NIV
"His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'
And so I guess that it really isn't up to me to decide what is right or wrong, it is not up to me to get involved directly and decide what is right or wrong...God will do that. I do believe I am responsible to ensure that I share some of what I've learned with others so that people can make informed choices, so others do not end up being mislead or misrepresented. And I know that it is also my responsiblity to remove myself from the negativity that this has brought me...because the negativity is bringing me to a place that is not following Christ's teachings and again, it's not up to me to pass judgement or dish out consequences for actions that are quite likely unethical. I am not the one, who those who may be participating, in this need to face.
So I will say this much about this and then it is so very much time to move away from any contact with this particular organization and the person who founded it and runs it...
If you donate your money, anywhere, you need to research the place you donate well before handing that money out. GuideStar is a website that may help you to navigate this... they are US based but it seems that you can get some Canadian information. Here and here are two links to organizations heavily involved with TTTS support, fundraising, etc. I will only say this much more on this subject and then I am dedicating myself to providing support to TTTS families with the support of the Fetal Hope Foundation....
Fetal Hope ROCKS!!! They raised around $90 000 in 2010 and it was split up at over $30 000 each to helping families travel to have surgeries or see doctors and to supporting those doctors through grant programs. They are the group that I have found the most support in and am so grateful for all they did to help us on our journey. They even contacted various doctors on our behalf when we were questioning test results while I was in the hospital. They called me then to see how I was, they emailed, they connected! And afterwards they were there to help me pick up the pieces and to feel that I was not alone. I have spent the last 2 years working at ways to help them and it is beginning to come to fruition...it that is a feeling that warms my heart. And maybe just another part of that spritual gift... thanks God!
Friday, January 27, 2012
Theirs is the Kingdom of God....
A friend posted this on facebook this morning and I had to share. For those that don't know, I work with children with special needs every day and know that I have witnessed the simplest form of faith in the eyes of those I serve. Children really do have a better grasp of God then we give them credit for...and moreover, they have a better grasp then we do because they don't question but also, I believe, because they are able to remember the arms of God around them while they rested in our wombs.
I envy my brother Kevin. He thinks God lives under his bed. At least that's what I heard him say one night. He was praying out loud in his bedroom, and I stopped to hear him say, “Are you there, God? Where are you? Oh, I see. Under the bed.”
I giggled at him and went off to my own room. Kevin's unique perspectives are often a source of amusement to me. But that night I realized something else and thought about it long after I finished laughing. I realized for the first time what a very different world Kevin lives in. He was born 30 years ago, mentally disabled because of complications during his birth. Apart from his size (he's 6’2” and built like a linebacker), he’s really not an adult.
He reasons and communicates with the capabilities of a 6-year-old, and always will. He’ll probably always believe that God lives under his bed, that Santa Claus is watching and that airplanes stay up in the sky because angels carry them.
I remember wondering if Kevin ever realizes he’s different. Is he ever dissatisfied with his monotonous life? He’s up before dawn each day to work at a workshop for the disabled, comes home to walk our cocker spaniel, returns to eat his favorite macaroni-and-cheese dinner at least 5 nights a week, and later goes to bed. The only variation in the entire scheme is laundry, when he hovers excitedly over the washing machine like a mother with her newborn child. He never seems dissatisfied with his life and is happy every day. He trots out to the bus every morning at 7:05, always happily looking forward to his day of simple work.
He wrings his hands excitedly while the water boils on the stove before dinner, even though it’s the same thing almost every night, and he stays up late twice a week to gather our dirty laundry for his next day's laundry chores.
And Saturdays - oh, the bliss of Saturdays! That's the day my Dad takes Kevin to the airport to have a soda, watch the planes land, and wonder loudly on the destination of each passenger inside. Kevin shouts as he claps his hands and wonders about the destination of the passengers on each flight. His anticipation for that simple trip is so great he can hardly sleep on Friday nights. And he goes through his world of the same daily rituals and the same weekend trip, every day, every week.
Kevin doesn't, and probably never will, know what it means to be discontent. His life is simple and he takes delight in it. He’s the most content person I know. Kevin will never know the complications of wealth or power. He doesn’t care what brand of clothes he wears, as long as he has some green shirts (green’s his favorite color), or what kind of food he eats. His simple needs have always been met, and he never worries that he doesn’t have “more.”
He’s diligent. Kevin is never so happy as when he’s working. When he unloads the dishwasher or vacuums the carpet, his heart is completely in it. He never gives up on a job when he starts, and gives it his all until it’s finished. But when he’s done, he knows how to relax. He’s not obsessed with other people’s work, with what they’re doing or not doing, but just pays attention to his own. His heart really is pure.
He still believes everyone tells the truth, that promises must be kept, and when you are wrong, you apologize. Free from pride and unconcerned with appearances, Kevin isn’t afraid to cry when he is hurt, angry, or sorry. He is always transparent, always sincere. What you see really is what you get with him. And he REALLY trusts God.
When he comes to Christ, he comes as a child. Kevin seems to know God - to really be friends with Him in a way that an “educated” person never will be. To Kevin, God feels like his closest companion.
In my own moments of doubt and frustrations with my Christianity, I envy the security Kevin has in his simple faith. It is then that I am most willing to admit that he must have some divine knowledge that rises far above mine. It’s then I realize that maybe Kevin isn’t the one with the handicap; I am. My obligations, my fear, my pride, my circumstances, my desire for more, more, more - they all become disabilities because I can’t seem to trust them to God's care the way Kevin can.
I wonder if Kevin just easily comprehends things I can never learn. I wonder if, when it comes to God, Kevin has wisdom I will never gain. After all, he’s spent his whole life in that kind of simple innocence, praying after dark every night and soaking up the goodness and love of God.
One day, when all the mysteries of heaven are opened, and all of us see how close God really was to our hearts, we'll realize that God really hears us and always heard the simple prayers of a boy who always believed that God lived under his bed. Everyone will be surprised. Except for one person, that is. Kevin won't be surprised at all, and he’ll wonder why we would be because, to him, God was always right there whenever he wanted or needed Him, right under his bed.
Matthew 19:14 But Jesus said, "Let the children come to me. Don't stop them! For the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to those who are like these children."
Such a wonderful message.
I envy my brother Kevin. He thinks God lives under his bed. At least that's what I heard him say one night. He was praying out loud in his bedroom, and I stopped to hear him say, “Are you there, God? Where are you? Oh, I see. Under the bed.”
I giggled at him and went off to my own room. Kevin's unique perspectives are often a source of amusement to me. But that night I realized something else and thought about it long after I finished laughing. I realized for the first time what a very different world Kevin lives in. He was born 30 years ago, mentally disabled because of complications during his birth. Apart from his size (he's 6’2” and built like a linebacker), he’s really not an adult.
He reasons and communicates with the capabilities of a 6-year-old, and always will. He’ll probably always believe that God lives under his bed, that Santa Claus is watching and that airplanes stay up in the sky because angels carry them.
I remember wondering if Kevin ever realizes he’s different. Is he ever dissatisfied with his monotonous life? He’s up before dawn each day to work at a workshop for the disabled, comes home to walk our cocker spaniel, returns to eat his favorite macaroni-and-cheese dinner at least 5 nights a week, and later goes to bed. The only variation in the entire scheme is laundry, when he hovers excitedly over the washing machine like a mother with her newborn child. He never seems dissatisfied with his life and is happy every day. He trots out to the bus every morning at 7:05, always happily looking forward to his day of simple work.
He wrings his hands excitedly while the water boils on the stove before dinner, even though it’s the same thing almost every night, and he stays up late twice a week to gather our dirty laundry for his next day's laundry chores.
And Saturdays - oh, the bliss of Saturdays! That's the day my Dad takes Kevin to the airport to have a soda, watch the planes land, and wonder loudly on the destination of each passenger inside. Kevin shouts as he claps his hands and wonders about the destination of the passengers on each flight. His anticipation for that simple trip is so great he can hardly sleep on Friday nights. And he goes through his world of the same daily rituals and the same weekend trip, every day, every week.
Kevin doesn't, and probably never will, know what it means to be discontent. His life is simple and he takes delight in it. He’s the most content person I know. Kevin will never know the complications of wealth or power. He doesn’t care what brand of clothes he wears, as long as he has some green shirts (green’s his favorite color), or what kind of food he eats. His simple needs have always been met, and he never worries that he doesn’t have “more.”
He’s diligent. Kevin is never so happy as when he’s working. When he unloads the dishwasher or vacuums the carpet, his heart is completely in it. He never gives up on a job when he starts, and gives it his all until it’s finished. But when he’s done, he knows how to relax. He’s not obsessed with other people’s work, with what they’re doing or not doing, but just pays attention to his own. His heart really is pure.
He still believes everyone tells the truth, that promises must be kept, and when you are wrong, you apologize. Free from pride and unconcerned with appearances, Kevin isn’t afraid to cry when he is hurt, angry, or sorry. He is always transparent, always sincere. What you see really is what you get with him. And he REALLY trusts God.
When he comes to Christ, he comes as a child. Kevin seems to know God - to really be friends with Him in a way that an “educated” person never will be. To Kevin, God feels like his closest companion.
In my own moments of doubt and frustrations with my Christianity, I envy the security Kevin has in his simple faith. It is then that I am most willing to admit that he must have some divine knowledge that rises far above mine. It’s then I realize that maybe Kevin isn’t the one with the handicap; I am. My obligations, my fear, my pride, my circumstances, my desire for more, more, more - they all become disabilities because I can’t seem to trust them to God's care the way Kevin can.
I wonder if Kevin just easily comprehends things I can never learn. I wonder if, when it comes to God, Kevin has wisdom I will never gain. After all, he’s spent his whole life in that kind of simple innocence, praying after dark every night and soaking up the goodness and love of God.
One day, when all the mysteries of heaven are opened, and all of us see how close God really was to our hearts, we'll realize that God really hears us and always heard the simple prayers of a boy who always believed that God lived under his bed. Everyone will be surprised. Except for one person, that is. Kevin won't be surprised at all, and he’ll wonder why we would be because, to him, God was always right there whenever he wanted or needed Him, right under his bed.
Matthew 19:14 But Jesus said, "Let the children come to me. Don't stop them! For the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to those who are like these children."
Such a wonderful message.
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Spiritual Gifts
This was the topic of Pastor Jeff’s sermon a few weeks ago and then again in the devotion book Geoff and I do a few days ago. It’s gotten me to thinking and then digging even further into it with a very lengthy ‘debate’ (that is a polite word for some words being exchanged online by people on opposite ends of the spectrum, some that weren’t very ‘politically appropriate’) about issues around what to do when you find out your babies have TTTS. And since it was a lengthy debate you get a lengthy novel post by yours truly LOL!
Pastor Jeff got me to thinking about my gifts when he said something along the lines of ‘God wants us to be a purpose driven people. He wants us to do good works and he gives us the tools so we can do this’.
Ephesians 2:10 (NIV)
10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
He encouraged us to think about what our spiritual gifts are and ask ourselves if we are using them to the best of our ability and for the right reasons.
Hmmmmm spiritual gifts….I really have no idea what this means in the eyes of a church or religion. Wikipedia defines it as this…
In Christianity, spiritual gifts (or charismata) are endowments given by the Holy Spirit. These are the supernatural graces which individual Christians need to fulfill the mission of the church.
There are lists of various types of gifts and after reading them all, I think this is the one that most applies to me, to what I believe is my gift and how I use it…but I’ll get to that in a bit.
16. Mercy: "The special ability that God gives to certain members of the Body of Christ to feel genuine empathy and compassion for individuals (both Christian and non-Christian) who suffer from distressing physical, mental, or emotional problems, and to translate that compassion into cheerfully done deeds which reflect Christ’s love and alleviate the suffering."
This gift is a practical gift. Those with this gift find themselves visiting and assisting those in need, and often feel the pain of the person they are helping within themself. People with this gift find it extremely difficult not to help those who seem less fortunate than themself.
I am not really sure if this is what spiritual gifts really means or just what some religions tell us that this is what is meant… but then again I am not sure if Jesus really cares what the classification of the gif t is but rather if we are using them or not.
Until I did this research I believed spiritual gifts to be talents you have, skills you have that you can use to better the world. (Back to Ephesians 2:10 again…different version this time….
Ephesians 2:10 (NLT)
10 For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.
And I had come to believe that this bettering is to hopefully be a form of evangelism…for if you are using your gifts and praising God through your gifts then others should see this in you…and from there, they will hopefully see how our amazing Lord is working in you. This belief was highly supported by what Pastor Jeff spoke about that Sunday…that by using your gifts, by being the masterpiece that God created you to be, you will be doing the good works He intended for you. And by doing these good works you will be showing others the strength of your Christian character….maybe even making them wonder what the secret to our happiness and contentedness in life is and wanting some of that for themselves.
Before I did this research I believed my gifts to be my writing and my ability to use words to express compassion, empathy, understanding, kindness and to use my gift of expression to give hope, to show that peace and hope can come after loss. I have said this before and I will use it as a mantra for my life I think…. ‘God gave me Cole and Cameron for a great and wonderful purpose. TTTS took one of them, made me fear for and protect (forever) the other and changed me forever. I believe that I was given TTTTS and this journey I am on because I am meant to impact others’ lives with my ability to express myself about how this journey has affected me. I am very certain that one purpose for me on this journey is to help others, to support them, to lend an ear and a shoulder to cry on and be there for them when they need an understanding friend. I do that through words which I seem to have a talent for putting together well…maybe not always orally but through written word. I have been told since the day I began blogging about our journey…back about 3 years and 9 days ago that I have a gift, a talent for writing. And so I believe I need to use that talent.
And I still believe this is my gift from God, a spiritual gift of sorts. But obviously the true gift is the gift of mercy….the basis for my desire to help others through their TTTS journey, their baby loss journey, their loss of any loved one journey, their journeys through struggles, crisis and burdens … all of this ties in to the gift that God has given me to feel genuine empathy and compassion for individuals who are suffering.
Now to why this gift has become a focus of conversation for me lately….
About 2 weeks ago a mom of TTTS survivors was giving support and advice to a mom who had just been diagnosed and told her to stay away from reading the ‘bad’ stories and the ‘bad’ outcomes and the hairs on my neck stood up. I got defensive and rightfully so. I didn’t present it maybe in the best way and that ended up getting others of single survivors and double losses involved as well. The big focus of my message that I posted over and over again was this…. When a parent of mono-di twins is diagnosed with TTTS…heck when the parent of any fetus is diagnosed with a serious condition , I believe it is their job to be their child’s/children’s best advocate and in order to do this they need to be educated in all aspects of what is affecting their child. I also know, first hand, that not being informed about all the scenarios of the disorder leads to an even more intense devastation when things don’t turn out the way you expected….when they aren’t just the outcome of the ‘good’ stories. We were not prepared to lose Cole. We were told of the percentages but we were given very good odds for double survival at admittance. Things progressed but this was explained to us by another doctor (Dr. Ryan and his fellow) and even then, there was still much optimism. We learned, then, about things like velamentous insertion (the cord being inserted into muscle, in our case 11cm, away from the edge of the placenta) and placental share but I didn’t look those things up, I didn’t know I should. I had no idea how often babes with poor share and poor insertion pass away after surgery. If I had, I would have been prepared. If I’d read about fetal anemia I would have been prepared for Cameron needing his transfusion after Cole passed away, I would have understood how serious it was and would have known that the transfusion was saving his brain and maybe his life…and was not something I would want to say no to…not that I considered it.
And so I spouted off about why I believe new diagnosed families need to read all stories. And of course that got some people worked up. Every one of those who got worked up had double survivors.. which proved a point to me…they don’t even really look at all angles, even after their babies are born.
Basically we, the parents with losses, were told over and over that our stories take away hope…of course it was presented in a much more positive way but that was the bottom line. I disagreed and still do. The fact that I never lost hope, even in my darkest moments, says that my story and meeting me online, is worthwhile and might easily give someone else hope. No wait, it did give someone else hope…and someone who has double survivors I might add! It did not seem to matter what we said, these angel mommy friends and I…and tons of double survivor moms too…some of these moms refused to concede that A)it might be a good idea to be educated in all aspects and outcomes, that B) hope can be found in the story that has your worst case scenario, that C) you might save your babies lives or at least impact their outcome by reading a story of an outcome you hope you never see and that D) they have these opinions about what NOT to read because they have the ‘best’ outcome…that because they have two survivors they are unable to put themselves in the place that contains what ifs, maybe I could or should have and what else could I know about this. And this last one is the one that pisses me off. NOT AT ALL because they have double survivors…I am so past that. No what makes me so angry is that someone who had the ‘best’ outcome thinks they have the right to advice someone not to educate themselves and prepare themselves for what could be their outcome.
In the end these discussions ended up with the founder of the TTTS Foundation ‘reprimanding’ us all for talking about all of this when we should be supporting the mom who originally posted about her babies. Valid point and I feel bad about that. But the fact is this support group presents things in a light that is often very positive and very one sided. They promote therapies like drinking boost and having horizontal bedrest as a way to ‘stop’/treat TTTS . Don’t’ get me wrong, this has worked for some cases…cases that never progressed past stage 1…but still!!!! This group seems heavy into support for those pregnant with 2 living babies and the end result of those double survivor pregnancies. Ok, ok..I am not here to bash anyone and I am. STOP!!!! Anyway…in the end this founder posted a note to us all to think of what we wanted our babies message to be to the world; what did we want their voice to be and were we really singing their song.
And you know what…I am! I am so very proud of the song I sing for my children. I am so very happy that I am able to tell their story with joy and hope and with peace. I am so glad that God has given me the gift of mercy…the ability to reach out with compassion and empathy…even when reliving it might be hard. I am so glad that He has given me the strength to reach out and even more so, the writing talent to be able to put those words down that give that comfort, hope and strength.
The voice I want for my babies, especially my angel, is the voice I sing with each day. It is a voice of empathy, compassion and support. It’s a song of hope and peace after loss. It’s a song of deep and purposeful meaning of a mission I am confident that God and my angel son guide me sing. It is my song and I will continue to sing it, and pray that will help others, until the day that I day.
Pastor Jeff got me to thinking about my gifts when he said something along the lines of ‘God wants us to be a purpose driven people. He wants us to do good works and he gives us the tools so we can do this’.
Ephesians 2:10 (NIV)
10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
He encouraged us to think about what our spiritual gifts are and ask ourselves if we are using them to the best of our ability and for the right reasons.
Hmmmmm spiritual gifts….I really have no idea what this means in the eyes of a church or religion. Wikipedia defines it as this…
In Christianity, spiritual gifts (or charismata) are endowments given by the Holy Spirit. These are the supernatural graces which individual Christians need to fulfill the mission of the church.
There are lists of various types of gifts and after reading them all, I think this is the one that most applies to me, to what I believe is my gift and how I use it…but I’ll get to that in a bit.
16. Mercy: "The special ability that God gives to certain members of the Body of Christ to feel genuine empathy and compassion for individuals (both Christian and non-Christian) who suffer from distressing physical, mental, or emotional problems, and to translate that compassion into cheerfully done deeds which reflect Christ’s love and alleviate the suffering."
This gift is a practical gift. Those with this gift find themselves visiting and assisting those in need, and often feel the pain of the person they are helping within themself. People with this gift find it extremely difficult not to help those who seem less fortunate than themself.
I am not really sure if this is what spiritual gifts really means or just what some religions tell us that this is what is meant… but then again I am not sure if Jesus really cares what the classification of the gif t is but rather if we are using them or not.
Until I did this research I believed spiritual gifts to be talents you have, skills you have that you can use to better the world. (Back to Ephesians 2:10 again…different version this time….
Ephesians 2:10 (NLT)
10 For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.
And I had come to believe that this bettering is to hopefully be a form of evangelism…for if you are using your gifts and praising God through your gifts then others should see this in you…and from there, they will hopefully see how our amazing Lord is working in you. This belief was highly supported by what Pastor Jeff spoke about that Sunday…that by using your gifts, by being the masterpiece that God created you to be, you will be doing the good works He intended for you. And by doing these good works you will be showing others the strength of your Christian character….maybe even making them wonder what the secret to our happiness and contentedness in life is and wanting some of that for themselves.
Before I did this research I believed my gifts to be my writing and my ability to use words to express compassion, empathy, understanding, kindness and to use my gift of expression to give hope, to show that peace and hope can come after loss. I have said this before and I will use it as a mantra for my life I think…. ‘God gave me Cole and Cameron for a great and wonderful purpose. TTTS took one of them, made me fear for and protect (forever) the other and changed me forever. I believe that I was given TTTTS and this journey I am on because I am meant to impact others’ lives with my ability to express myself about how this journey has affected me. I am very certain that one purpose for me on this journey is to help others, to support them, to lend an ear and a shoulder to cry on and be there for them when they need an understanding friend. I do that through words which I seem to have a talent for putting together well…maybe not always orally but through written word. I have been told since the day I began blogging about our journey…back about 3 years and 9 days ago that I have a gift, a talent for writing. And so I believe I need to use that talent.
And I still believe this is my gift from God, a spiritual gift of sorts. But obviously the true gift is the gift of mercy….the basis for my desire to help others through their TTTS journey, their baby loss journey, their loss of any loved one journey, their journeys through struggles, crisis and burdens … all of this ties in to the gift that God has given me to feel genuine empathy and compassion for individuals who are suffering.
Now to why this gift has become a focus of conversation for me lately….
About 2 weeks ago a mom of TTTS survivors was giving support and advice to a mom who had just been diagnosed and told her to stay away from reading the ‘bad’ stories and the ‘bad’ outcomes and the hairs on my neck stood up. I got defensive and rightfully so. I didn’t present it maybe in the best way and that ended up getting others of single survivors and double losses involved as well. The big focus of my message that I posted over and over again was this…. When a parent of mono-di twins is diagnosed with TTTS…heck when the parent of any fetus is diagnosed with a serious condition , I believe it is their job to be their child’s/children’s best advocate and in order to do this they need to be educated in all aspects of what is affecting their child. I also know, first hand, that not being informed about all the scenarios of the disorder leads to an even more intense devastation when things don’t turn out the way you expected….when they aren’t just the outcome of the ‘good’ stories. We were not prepared to lose Cole. We were told of the percentages but we were given very good odds for double survival at admittance. Things progressed but this was explained to us by another doctor (Dr. Ryan and his fellow) and even then, there was still much optimism. We learned, then, about things like velamentous insertion (the cord being inserted into muscle, in our case 11cm, away from the edge of the placenta) and placental share but I didn’t look those things up, I didn’t know I should. I had no idea how often babes with poor share and poor insertion pass away after surgery. If I had, I would have been prepared. If I’d read about fetal anemia I would have been prepared for Cameron needing his transfusion after Cole passed away, I would have understood how serious it was and would have known that the transfusion was saving his brain and maybe his life…and was not something I would want to say no to…not that I considered it.
And so I spouted off about why I believe new diagnosed families need to read all stories. And of course that got some people worked up. Every one of those who got worked up had double survivors.. which proved a point to me…they don’t even really look at all angles, even after their babies are born.
Basically we, the parents with losses, were told over and over that our stories take away hope…of course it was presented in a much more positive way but that was the bottom line. I disagreed and still do. The fact that I never lost hope, even in my darkest moments, says that my story and meeting me online, is worthwhile and might easily give someone else hope. No wait, it did give someone else hope…and someone who has double survivors I might add! It did not seem to matter what we said, these angel mommy friends and I…and tons of double survivor moms too…some of these moms refused to concede that A)it might be a good idea to be educated in all aspects and outcomes, that B) hope can be found in the story that has your worst case scenario, that C) you might save your babies lives or at least impact their outcome by reading a story of an outcome you hope you never see and that D) they have these opinions about what NOT to read because they have the ‘best’ outcome…that because they have two survivors they are unable to put themselves in the place that contains what ifs, maybe I could or should have and what else could I know about this. And this last one is the one that pisses me off. NOT AT ALL because they have double survivors…I am so past that. No what makes me so angry is that someone who had the ‘best’ outcome thinks they have the right to advice someone not to educate themselves and prepare themselves for what could be their outcome.
In the end these discussions ended up with the founder of the TTTS Foundation ‘reprimanding’ us all for talking about all of this when we should be supporting the mom who originally posted about her babies. Valid point and I feel bad about that. But the fact is this support group presents things in a light that is often very positive and very one sided. They promote therapies like drinking boost and having horizontal bedrest as a way to ‘stop’/treat TTTS . Don’t’ get me wrong, this has worked for some cases…cases that never progressed past stage 1…but still!!!! This group seems heavy into support for those pregnant with 2 living babies and the end result of those double survivor pregnancies. Ok, ok..I am not here to bash anyone and I am. STOP!!!! Anyway…in the end this founder posted a note to us all to think of what we wanted our babies message to be to the world; what did we want their voice to be and were we really singing their song.
And you know what…I am! I am so very proud of the song I sing for my children. I am so very happy that I am able to tell their story with joy and hope and with peace. I am so glad that God has given me the gift of mercy…the ability to reach out with compassion and empathy…even when reliving it might be hard. I am so glad that He has given me the strength to reach out and even more so, the writing talent to be able to put those words down that give that comfort, hope and strength.
The voice I want for my babies, especially my angel, is the voice I sing with each day. It is a voice of empathy, compassion and support. It’s a song of hope and peace after loss. It’s a song of deep and purposeful meaning of a mission I am confident that God and my angel son guide me sing. It is my song and I will continue to sing it, and pray that will help others, until the day that I day.
Monday, January 9, 2012
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year everyone!
I know, I am a bit late. Truth be told, I blogged so much in December that I needed to take a break. And now I have one for today and likely another with days.
Today I want to post, publicly, my goals for 2012…not resolutions because if that was the case, I’m already busted. But instead I have goals that I believe will be achievable but I also know that I will struggle with them at times, I will be tempted to quit and I promise that I will work hard at overcoming the obstacles in my way.
Yesterday in church Pastor Jeff spoke about extreme makeovers and what that can look in your relationship with Christ. I think 2011 was the year for that in so many areas of my life. Most definitely in my faith but also, for those that have seen the pictures, in me, my size, my health and my attitude.
This was me in the fall of 2010
This was me in July...about 30lbs lighter but not really exercising yet.
And me just a month ago or so... 50 lbs lighter!!!
And although 2011 consisted of a pretty extreme makeover, I don’t think that it is over yet.
Ephesians 2:10(NLT)
10 For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.
I don’t believe that we are ever done growing and changing, that God is ever done working on each of his masterpieces. He gives us challenges, brings us new joy, creates a path for us so that we will do the things that he planned for us the day we were born. Earlier this fall I began reading a book called ‘Thin Within’…not sure if I mentioned it or not. It is a grace approach to weight loss and it really has changed many areas of my life. But I’ve slipped there and found myself unfocused, not listening to my body, to my stomach, to my head and to my heart when it came to food. Well maybe I listened to my heart and ate for emotional reasons but I did not listen to it from the aspect of the love God has for me and how much he wants me to be my God given size.
So my goals for 2012….
My first and most important goal is to learn more about the Lord and grow my relationship with Christ. When I look back at all the things that happened in this past year and at where my faith journey has gone I am amazed and yet I am also aware that many things, positive things, did not change. I was surprised by this. I thought I’d changed, grown and that before I thought differently but I realize that I am the same person deep inside , that what I thought about my life and my journey, what I valued and who I was really aren’t the same inside. The difference is, I think, on the outside. I that is what I wish to work on…projecting the love I have for the Lord in all that I do, to improve the way I interact with others, to follow his teachings in all that I do and say. To achieve the first part of this goal, to learn more about God I am planning to read the bible from start to …..well to wherever I get to I guess. I have started and am following ‘My Daily Bread’ s bible in a year guide. So far I have read up to Genesis 23…and am already about 6 chapters behind. Oh well…all in due time.
Ephesians 4:16 (NLT)
16 He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love.
My second goal is centered around my health because I know that I have been given the gift of this life and this healthy body for a reason…I just need to make the body last as long as possible! First and foremost I need to concentrate when I am eating, focus on my food and not get distracted…and therefore eat too much. I need to pay attention to my body and only eat if I am hungry. And above all, I need to remember who gave us the gift of the food we eat and give thanks for it. (A tip from Thin Within… for one meal thank God for each bite you eat as you eat it and really concentrate on how good it tastes…I was amazed how amazing it tasted and how quickly I became full because I took the time to eat and be thankful)
I want to eat healthier (boy have the last few weeks been hard on my weight loss…it’s been a gain). I finally conceded today that I have to enter my current weight into the program I use and stop putting it off until I weigh what I did a month ago or so…that isn’t being honest but moreover it’s not encouraging. I need to see the numbers coming down again on paper or the computer screen, I need my online friends who are part of the program I use (myfitnesspal.com … I highly recommend this program and especially it’s smartphone app) to be able to encourage me when I do put in the weekly weigh in amounts…which at my current weight and loss rate compared to where I was…well it would have been a month maybe before I’d be seeing ‘Jodie has lost 0.5 lbs since her last weigh in (6 weeks ago LOL).
I need to get vegetables back into my diet more and I need to eat sweets less. I need to add in healthier protein and take out more fat. I also, desperately, need to get back to exercising every day. No I need to get back to doing cardio more often and continue exercising every week day and adding in weekends too. Right now I do 20 min utes of weights each morning 4-5 days a week but never get cardio in except to walk extra steps during my work day. I used to walk almost every day for 30-40 minutes. So my goal… 20 min of cardio 2 evenings and one morning a week and 20+ minutes of weights 4 times a week. My goal for the weekends is to take as many steps as possible (chasing Cameron around the arena does count LOL) and do one 20 minute cardio workout over the course of the weekend.
My last goal for 2012 is to finish my book. It’s coming… I wrote (well took from the start of my blog and rewrote) another big section over the holidays AND I finally got it out to a few friends to have them look it over, give me their opinion on the styles I’ve written it in. I still don’t know what I plan to do with it when it is done. I am thinking my first place I will send it to is the publisher of the book that my boys story is already in…. Forever Linked.
But if anyone has suggestions, knows a publisher, has you friend…etc… you get the drift. I’d love to get some information and start looking at that aspect of it.
So 2012 looks like the beginning of another great leg in my journey of life.
I know, I am a bit late. Truth be told, I blogged so much in December that I needed to take a break. And now I have one for today and likely another with days.
Today I want to post, publicly, my goals for 2012…not resolutions because if that was the case, I’m already busted. But instead I have goals that I believe will be achievable but I also know that I will struggle with them at times, I will be tempted to quit and I promise that I will work hard at overcoming the obstacles in my way.
Yesterday in church Pastor Jeff spoke about extreme makeovers and what that can look in your relationship with Christ. I think 2011 was the year for that in so many areas of my life. Most definitely in my faith but also, for those that have seen the pictures, in me, my size, my health and my attitude.
This was me in July...about 30lbs lighter but not really exercising yet.
And although 2011 consisted of a pretty extreme makeover, I don’t think that it is over yet.
Ephesians 2:10(NLT)
10 For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.
I don’t believe that we are ever done growing and changing, that God is ever done working on each of his masterpieces. He gives us challenges, brings us new joy, creates a path for us so that we will do the things that he planned for us the day we were born. Earlier this fall I began reading a book called ‘Thin Within’…not sure if I mentioned it or not. It is a grace approach to weight loss and it really has changed many areas of my life. But I’ve slipped there and found myself unfocused, not listening to my body, to my stomach, to my head and to my heart when it came to food. Well maybe I listened to my heart and ate for emotional reasons but I did not listen to it from the aspect of the love God has for me and how much he wants me to be my God given size.
So my goals for 2012….
My first and most important goal is to learn more about the Lord and grow my relationship with Christ. When I look back at all the things that happened in this past year and at where my faith journey has gone I am amazed and yet I am also aware that many things, positive things, did not change. I was surprised by this. I thought I’d changed, grown and that before I thought differently but I realize that I am the same person deep inside , that what I thought about my life and my journey, what I valued and who I was really aren’t the same inside. The difference is, I think, on the outside. I that is what I wish to work on…projecting the love I have for the Lord in all that I do, to improve the way I interact with others, to follow his teachings in all that I do and say. To achieve the first part of this goal, to learn more about God I am planning to read the bible from start to …..well to wherever I get to I guess. I have started and am following ‘My Daily Bread’ s bible in a year guide. So far I have read up to Genesis 23…and am already about 6 chapters behind. Oh well…all in due time.
Ephesians 4:16 (NLT)
16 He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love.
My second goal is centered around my health because I know that I have been given the gift of this life and this healthy body for a reason…I just need to make the body last as long as possible! First and foremost I need to concentrate when I am eating, focus on my food and not get distracted…and therefore eat too much. I need to pay attention to my body and only eat if I am hungry. And above all, I need to remember who gave us the gift of the food we eat and give thanks for it. (A tip from Thin Within… for one meal thank God for each bite you eat as you eat it and really concentrate on how good it tastes…I was amazed how amazing it tasted and how quickly I became full because I took the time to eat and be thankful)
I want to eat healthier (boy have the last few weeks been hard on my weight loss…it’s been a gain). I finally conceded today that I have to enter my current weight into the program I use and stop putting it off until I weigh what I did a month ago or so…that isn’t being honest but moreover it’s not encouraging. I need to see the numbers coming down again on paper or the computer screen, I need my online friends who are part of the program I use (myfitnesspal.com … I highly recommend this program and especially it’s smartphone app) to be able to encourage me when I do put in the weekly weigh in amounts…which at my current weight and loss rate compared to where I was…well it would have been a month maybe before I’d be seeing ‘Jodie has lost 0.5 lbs since her last weigh in (6 weeks ago LOL).
I need to get vegetables back into my diet more and I need to eat sweets less. I need to add in healthier protein and take out more fat. I also, desperately, need to get back to exercising every day. No I need to get back to doing cardio more often and continue exercising every week day and adding in weekends too. Right now I do 20 min utes of weights each morning 4-5 days a week but never get cardio in except to walk extra steps during my work day. I used to walk almost every day for 30-40 minutes. So my goal… 20 min of cardio 2 evenings and one morning a week and 20+ minutes of weights 4 times a week. My goal for the weekends is to take as many steps as possible (chasing Cameron around the arena does count LOL) and do one 20 minute cardio workout over the course of the weekend.
My last goal for 2012 is to finish my book. It’s coming… I wrote (well took from the start of my blog and rewrote) another big section over the holidays AND I finally got it out to a few friends to have them look it over, give me their opinion on the styles I’ve written it in. I still don’t know what I plan to do with it when it is done. I am thinking my first place I will send it to is the publisher of the book that my boys story is already in…. Forever Linked.
But if anyone has suggestions, knows a publisher, has you friend…etc… you get the drift. I’d love to get some information and start looking at that aspect of it.
So 2012 looks like the beginning of another great leg in my journey of life.
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